Alone Poem

No one understands how alone I feel. When you look in my eyes and one might see happiness inside but within my bones, I'm falling apart.

Not Good Enough

© Imza
I help you through hard times, as you do I
But you really don't know how much I hide
Even though we are the best of friends
I really don't think you can understand
I can't bear the hurt, I can't stand the pain
A feeling of numbness I can't explain.

This is a life in which I walk alone
Full of hope shattered and broken
Always angry for no reason at all
Constantly wanting to end this brawl
Fighting with myself again, and again,
Sometimes I want this life to end

Mom's depressed but chooses to hide
Takes out her anger on those by her side
Doesn't understand I try to help
She shuns me out, and hates instead

Grandma's enduring an unstoppable fate
sickness has gotten her on the plate
Its sad to see such an innocent person
Become another cancer victim

Too many friends are hurt as well
Thinking that their life is hell
Too many friends wanting to stop
Thinking suicide is the only option

But inside me is the worst of all
I don't know how long I can stand tall
Memories of happiness are shooed away
But horrible twisted thoughts to stay

Nothing I do can make her proud
There's no silver lining on her clouds
I'm a rainstorm filled with dark black skies
And a haunting rainfall full of lies
I only wish I could make her see
I'm trying hard so I can be
Someone she that can trust and love
Instead she tells me I'm not good enough
Everything I do is a wrong decision
She constantly tells me I'm not living
The path that she truly wishes I'd take
But I'm only one big mistake
If I could I'd erase myself from here
I wouldn't have to live this fear

I also wish I could be skinny
And always happy, fun, and pretty
Instead I look at myself in the mirror
Disappointed in the reflection that appears
It's hard to live when you don't love who you are
Wishing that you could change it all

Every day I make a mental note
How much would I miss, if I decide to go
And how much hurt makes me lean towards the edge
Is slowly creeping up the hedge
How much longer can I last?
Before my life becomes one of the past.

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Published: Oct 2009
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18 Stories on "Not Good Enough"
  1. Kat White Submitted on Thursday, November 05, 2009

    This is so so sad I cry for the person in this poem. my heart breaks and aches for them. why don't some parents show the love for the child instead of making them feel this way. the mum does love the child but hasn't been shown how to be a good mum.
    I pray that the person who this is about knows how special they really are.

  2. Addrienne Submitted on Tuesday, March 02, 2010

    I know exactly how you feel. I also have a mom who doesn't love me for who I am just because we're different in such a way. And what really upsets me is that sometimes she says she wants to slap me until she could see blood from my very cheeks and write with my blood on the wall saying, "You should be more like me?" But I still ask this question: Does she really love for who I am? This one I call "Mom"?

  3. Haleigh, Edmonton Submitted on Saturday, April 10, 2010

    I'm sorry to hear that's how you feel, but it kind of feels good that I'm not the only one that feels this way, ya know? I mean no matter what I do they love my sister more then me, my best isn't good enough, they just cant seem to love me! I hope things get better. One thing you should think of when you think death is the only way is, if you die you won't be able to prove how wrong they were about you! live to prove them wrong!!

  4. Jakki Musgrave, Phoenix AZ Submitted on Thursday, May 27, 2010

    Oh, honey I am so sorry you feel like this....it's not right. I want you to know that right now it seems impossible through the day to day but life will get better...it's all about getting through the abuse as best as you can, and getting away to live the life you deserve. No one deserves to feel like this. You matter. A lot. I'm so sorry.

  5. Erin Submitted on Sunday, August 08, 2010

    I know just how you feel! but everyday is a new day and things will get worse before they get better but remember that they will always get better! I am glad to know that I am not the only one out there who feels this way!

  6. Camille Submitted on Tuesday, September 14, 2010

    MY heart breaks for you and I hope you are alright. I grew up in a similar situation and there were so many days that I didn't think I would make it. I am grown now and it still hurts but I have other people in my life now that truely care about me. My life that I have now was worth hanging in there for.

  7. Shannon Carter, Vermont Submitted on Saturday, September 25, 2010

    This poem brought tears to my eyes, because this is how I feel. I am only fifteen years old and I feel like I am alone and not understood. I am happy to know I am not the only one out there.

  8. Desirae, Lost Submitted on Thursday, September 30, 2010

    I can agree with this. My parents love me, but can't understand. I am always happy and alive, but on the inside I'm crumbling. Yesterday I broke out crying while I was playing with my dog because she won't live forever. Delilah (dog) understands me, and is my true friend. My friends think I'm happy, bubbly, and love life. Truth: I am depressed, ignored, and hate life. I want to die, but that would hurt people. So I go on in suffering, but the worst part: I'm alone in my misery.

  9. Jessica Submitted on Sunday, December 12, 2010

    When I read this, I started to cry. Not only because it's sad, but because I can relate to and know how you feel. My parents have told me that I'm not good enough, I'm a disappointment, they don't love me. I'm also known as a happy person. I guess I'm a good actor. I'm Very depressed and have many physiological disorders. But, everytime I go for help, I'm shut out. I wish to be accepted for who I am and for people to love me. I'm alone.

  10. Lauren Submitted on Tuesday, January 04, 2011

    Its a sad comfort when you hear that you are not alone.
    I have always felt that my skeletons consume me, when I was about 13 I asked my so-called Mom "what is the point of life and living?" Her response should of been realizing this is not normal 13 year old question, but instead was "You act just like your grandpa, he always asked stupid things like that." My grandpa left our family when I was about 13 cause he was depressed. Is it possible to have a parent to love you? Because sometimes it feels impossible. There is a life separate from the one of school and home. I prefer the school one.

  11. Brooklyn Submitted on Wednesday, February 23, 2011

    Your never alone, You might feel this way, but There will always be someone ready to talk. There for you when no one else is around. I hope everything works out for you, Because Hun you have your whole life ahead of you. Don't give up. Stand tall, And Keep going forward into life. I wish you luck with everything. My heart goes out for you.

    @Lauren: Most Mothers that can't show love is because they never felt love and don't know how to give it. You Are loved, by someone, I have faith in you. And EVERY other girl out there because life's not easy. It's not supposed to be, Good luck!

  12. Wendy Submitted on Friday, March 25, 2011

    You know sometimes I feel alone because I feel like I have nobody. And sometimes I wish everything can get better for me. This is why I read poetry because it makes me feel a lot better. I love the poems here they are wonderful.

  13. Tamera, NC Submitted on Wednesday, April 06, 2011

    This is so sad. Keep your head high and know that everyone is beautiful no matter what shape or size you are. In your time of trouble look towards God who is always there for you. I am a big girl and I try to lose weight but it doesn't happen as fast as I would like but I'm okay with that because I know that I am somebody and my spot on this earth is not vacant. Just tell yourself I am somebody and I will succeed no matter who tries to put me down if I fall it's not because I can't get back up but it's because I allow myself to. From now on rise amongst your problems and pray everytime you feel alone.

  14. Alexzandria, NC Submitted on Sunday, April 17, 2011

    I completely understand what you're going through. My own mother takes out her anger/depression on her love ones but she doesn't realize it. My mother doesn't realize that she is hurting me but I still love her dearly. I just completely understand EVERYTHING you wrote in you're poem. It's good to know someone out there knows how I feel. But that doesn't mean I want ANYONE to feel this way. Hang in there k? (P.S. I'm 13)

  15. Taylor, TN Submitted on Tuesday, May 03, 2011

    I know the feeling of your pain. I have the exact thoughts everyday that I live this terrible life. I have to fight all the time against my thoughts. It's terrible. I'm sorry you have to go through this the way you do. but never feel alone. You have people all over the world who feel the exact same way, and are here to talk to and help you.

  16. New Orleans Submitted on Sunday, October 23, 2011

    Wow, this says EXACTLY how I am feeling. I feel like nothing I do is ever right. I am so happy there are other people out there and I am not the only one. I always think about running away or killing myself but now I take counseling and it helps a lot. but I am still trying. The only difference in this poem is I am skinny.

  17. Houston Submitted on Saturday, November 12, 2011

    I'm glad to hear that other people know how I feel. This poem means the world to me because me and tons of others can relate to it.
    The only thing is that I am skinny...
    :)(:

  18. Hannah, Canada Submitted on Saturday, March 03, 2012

    I totally know what you're going through. My mom's the exact way, she claims she loves me yet every day I get told how worthless, lazy, and self centered I am. I try so hard to be just how she wants me to be but it's still never enough.

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